Leauxra's Small House

"If you win the lottery," I said to Boyfriend, "what will you buy me?"

Boyfriend paused, looking thoughtful.  

"I will buy you a very, very small house," he said.

"YAY!" I said, jumping up and down and clapping my hands.

Boyfriend is so awesome.

He knows me.

I get these obsessions.

One day, I might need to learn how to solve a Rubric's Cube in under 5 minutes, and another time I might absolutely need to make a set of speakers out of a vinyl toy.  I will learn everything there is to know about keeping an octopus as a pet in a landlocked state, and later I will figure out how to make real, authentic, ginger beer.

My 4" Munny speakers.  My mom thinks they look like "little cannibals".  They are made from little blank vinyl toys and a cheap pair of speakers I got for $5 at WalMart, a little paint, a little joint compound, and a bit of patience.

Last November or so, my thing was tiny houses.  I am talking 100-400 square feet.  I read everything I could about them, looked at plans, looked at pictures of built houses, and promptly decided I needed to not only build and live in one, but I should design it, too.

The first house I designed was made almost entirely of glass.  I named it "A Stone's Throw".  It had to be built into the side of a hill.  It was three stories and about 500 square feet, not counting the below ground garage/brewery.

I don't actually know anything about architectural design, structural engineering, materials, geology, electrical installation, plumbing, drainage or pretty much anything else, but I did have $13 for a graph paper moleskin notebooks, and I immediately set to work.

My lack of understanding of basic physics shows up in some of my more whimsical designs, such as the above structure with a "floating" loft held up by a single center pole.

But as I designed, the houses started getting bigger.  More and more things became essential.  I would need a place to brew beer.  I would want a studio to paint and write.  Somewhere to sleep, and yes, somewhere to eat might be nice.

I may wish to shower occasionally.

One of my larger designs, this one ends up being 1000 square feet or so, and 5 floors (not counting the roof).

I let my imagination wander.  No need to be constrained to 100 square feet, or 500 square feet, or even 1000.  I started designing houses that would fit the lifestyle that I imagine for myself.

It is the "just in case I become an evil wizard" design.  I will have to build it in a mountainous valley with its own spring watersource, haunted barrows and orc-infested forest..  I will have a moat and a drawbridge, and underground escape route possibly guarded by my legion of the undead.

Screw being prepared for the zombie uprising.  I should be IN CONTROL of it.

And I learned something about myself.

Everything I do is about me becoming an evil wizard.